Archive for September, 2004

Camping with Ivan

Thursday, September 23rd, 2004

Don’s truck rolled into the Jim Thorpe Camping Resort slightly after 1 am. Dead and dark, just like we expected it to be. At least the gate wasn’t closed, so we were going to be able to get down to the camp site without having to haul our gear piecemeal through the rain, which was now starting to intensify in frequency and strength.

We pulled into our usual campsite — referred to by the owner as “The Grove” in the camp maps — and could see the camp fire burning bright. Damn right! I knew the rest of the guys would still be up, fighting the elements and drinking the night away. While Don repositioned his truck I ran down to say hello to the brave souls.

All I found was a dog and a half-soaked fire.

Tents all around, tables resting under large draping tarps, but no one still braving the storm. Not to say that I blame them, either. This was no normal rain storm we were braving to keep the 6 year long tradition of No-Maam going — this was the remnants of Hurricane Ivan, and it still had quite a lot of strength to it.

Don and I raced to set up our tents as quickly as possible. The storm was strengthening by the minute and the quicker our shelters were in place the quicker we could get inside of them. Aluminum poles and lightning bolts aren’t a good combo, but at least we had some massively towering trees to (hopefully) attract any electrical surge away from us. Just another incentive to work quickly.

Fifteen minutes later my tent was in place and I was huddled by the fire that was slowly being drown by the river of rainwater that was running through our site, beer in hand and draped in drenched clothing. In the back of my head I was starting to wonder if the trip to see Brian Regan perform his stand-up routine in Lakewood’s Strand Theater was worth the delay in our departure time, but it was a short lived thought — a good show and a free ticket are hard to turn down.

I turned in for the night and stared at the ceiling of my tent, listening to the rain bouncing off the sides and through the branches above. With nothing but time on my hands, my mind was now left to contemplate and reminisce. I had music from The Bomb Squad and Umphrey’s McGee stuck in a constant loop in my cortex while I started to outline a letter in the style of Hunter S. Thompson in my cerebellum. Must mostly I tried to define the fork in the road of life I can feel approaching.

What it looks like and what my choices will be I have no idea yet — it’s too shrouded in the mists to still define, but I know it’s there. It could very well be another career path that I’m approaching — my little video editing projects gave me a taste of working with moving pictures and I could see making that a bigger part of my resume. It could be the beginnings of a Canadian escape plan in case G.W. thwarts common sense and logic by winning (or usurping) another term in the White House. But if I had to bet on the change coming, I’d say it would be in the form of a book — one to be written, not read, by yours truly.

Yeah, that last part was not a typo. What it will be and what it will look like I have no clue yet, but it’s been brooding and bubbling under the surface for a while. My skills with the crafting of words are the sharpest they’ve ever been and this might be that one cosmic launch window I’ve been waiting for. A chance to do something that reaches above and beyond my perceived means. Something that might live beyond my time on this plane. Don’t expect me to say much more about it until I actually have something worthwhile to show. I’m getting sick of talking about doing great things — I’d much rather just do them. Of course, if this does come to pass you can hold my cousin Sharon responsible since she planted the seed in my head some years ago.

But back to camping. Skip ahead to Saturday morning and the dying throes of Ivan. By noon the rain had stopped altogether and the cold front following it began to creep in, slowly at first but still making its presence known. I fought a long, treacherous battle with Rolling Rock and Amstel and nearly lost the battle for my lunch, but instead it left me in a vengeful state that led to a long hike down to the lake side and some exploration of the nearby Switchback Railroad, the gravity-fed line that moved coal and miners back and forth along its narrow gauge rails. Its second life is that of hiking and biking trails with the rail lines having long since been removed.

With my head clearing I made my way back to the camp site for the festival of eating and drinking. This was by far one of the best nights I’ve ever had at No-Maam — just the general sense of relaxation and the sound of Electric Mud and other assorted blues blasting from the stereo. Then there were the cigars…a nice touch but the few times I choose to indulge myself in that sinful habit I always walk away with my head spinning. Guess that’s a good enough reason to keep from indulging in the future, but somehow I doubt that will keep me from having another ceremonial stogie in the future.

The Sunday camp breakdown day was about the most orderly I’d ever witnessed. We had things broken down, cleaned, fireless and mobile at about a quarter to noon — some kind of speed record I’d imagine, if we’d been keep records on those kind of mindless facts. One thing we have been keep track of the past few years was the No-Maam MVP, with Don collecting the last two awards.

As we broke camp it was decided that since we never manage to finish emptying the traditional Jagermeister trophy that this year would have no MVP, but as Don and I drove back, he proclaimed that he finally figured out who was the MVP this year: all of us. We braved the elements when lesser campers were cowering in their dry rooms and slept on the soggy ground when others were curled up tightly in their beds with fluffy down comforters.

I humbly accept my co-MVP award, along with the other 10 recipients.

Stills in motion and the flight of lost souls

Wednesday, September 15th, 2004

Damn me for leaving my good camera at home. Just needed to get that on the record before I begin this brain dump, because I’m still kicking myself some four days after the fact. By now I’m certain to have lost your focus, so let me back-peddle to Saturday night and fill in the blanks.

I did a decent job of finding something interesting and enriching to do with my evening. The digital film festival Resfest was in town and I decided to take in four hours worth of short films. I’m finding myself drawn more and more to the prospect of working with moving images, even if it’s only as another in a long line of hobbies. Taking in a sampling of the best examples produced with digital tools that I’m starting to introduce myself to seemed like a good use of free time to me.

The first 2 hours were spent watching “Shorts #3″, which included a fairly wide range of subjects. My favorites were “Grasshopper” (an interview with an enlightened man drawn over in an ever-changing sea of artistic style), “Bicycle Gangs of New York” (half music video, half documentary of those who ride the NY streets on two wheel power) and “Nothing” (the life story of a man raised as a bank robber who brings transcendental meditation to English prisons).

The next two hours were spent laughing, cringing and repeating the process courtesy of the collection of shorts called “Bushwacked!”. Got a guess as to the primary subject matter? While clips like BOOM! and The Voice (among others from Johan Söderberg) focused more on G.W. himself, my favorite focused its crosshairs on something just as harmful to the world at large: the World Trade Organization.

Called “The Horribly Stupid Stunt (Which Has Resulted in His Untimely Death)”, this piece of reality gone humorously right was propigated by a group called The Yes Men. It seems that someone accidentally mistook the group’s site — GATT.org — for the real trade organization and extended an invitation to speak at a conference to the group. Of course, they accepted and it all goes downhill from there.

But all this still doesn’t explain why I’m cursing myself for leaving my camera at home.

Well, the films were being shown just a few blocks from Ground Zero and just happened to coincide with September 11th and the resurrection of the Tribute in Light. Coming out of the theater you couldn’t help but look up into the towering beams as they projected into the heavens. The beams were illuminating either passing birds, bugs or dust that kept weaving back and forth through the light, which to me seemed like souls of those lost in the towers climbing upwards.

That’s why I’m cursing myself. Such a great opportunity for a moving, memorable picture and I left my gear back in the crash pad in Weehawken. I tried to get something on visual record by using my camera phone, but the quality is sub-standard to say the very least. I guess I’ll just have to look at brooklynvegan’s shot from across the East river and continue to curse my own forgetfulness.

Drifting, deepness, focus and funk

Thursday, September 9th, 2004

The re-evaluation train has come around again with the end of summer (screw what the calendar says — Labor day ends summer, end of statement). Time to start thinking of what the next few months will hold and in what direction to point myself. Everyone goes through it, but I just happen to do my evaluations in public from time to time.

Should I even keep doing that? Don’t get me wrong, I love the whole writing thing and I plan to keep it going. Still, I notice a shift in the voice of my ongoing torture of the english language and it just so happens to be intersecting with a creative void. Ideas I had set in stone just a month ago have gone and evaporated and now I don’t know what will come to pass.

Maybe some schooling will help clear that. Yup, I’m doing the whole continuing education thing over at the School of Visual Arts; to enhance my personal and professional toolkit, to explore my own psyche a bit, to meet some new faces in the metro area, but mainly just to get out of the damn apartment a few more nights each week. The courses in question are Flash and Illustration Basics.

You better believe I’ll eventually subject you all to my works, but at this point I think some of you might actually like the things I make. Seriously, what’s wrong with you sick freaks?

Anyway, at least I’m doing this all with a relatively clean bill of health. Last night I finally made use of the health insurance I worked so hard to get. I’m trying hard to take care of myself and starting the annual physical ritual is a decent place to start. I’m even considering doing something for my mental health and seeking out a head shrinker — I’ve had a lot of shit from my childhood that I’ve been “dealing” with and I think it best to unravel as best I can before I move onto the next phase of my life. Besides, if it’s covered by my health insurance then why not?

So in summation of my situation: same as it ever was.

Face your enemy

Thursday, September 2nd, 2004

The fear. The loathing. The dread. Call it what you will but I think I’ve caught it.

I can feel the icy fingers closing around my head far more often than I want to admit. My voice, once strong and unwavering has reverted back to that of a scared and confused youth. I no longer know what I want or who I am. Maybe I’m losing my mind. Or maybe it’s just the times I’m living in. This city is living in the throes of an occupation and by extension I think it’s screwing with my brain waves in unforseen ways.

I took a stroll through midtown last night. I missed the chance to be part of the gigantic protest on Sunday as I was visiting with friends and family back in my former life. The media did a so-so job of covering it, but some of those I know in the real give their own pictures and experiences, which has helped somewhat to offset my sense of civic guilt. Still, that thread of the dread lingered, so the next best thing I could think of doing would be for to catch a glimpse of the scourge that has wrapped this city in it’s bony fingers.

Every corner I passed from Grand Central on Lexington was was patrolled by at least two officers. Black SUVs and patrol cars lined the sides of the streets. Half of the street was closed for official use only. Flashing lights and sirens abounded in all directions. Fortress New York in all it’s glory, ladies and gentlemen.

On the sidewalks, every third person seemed to wear that damning laminate around their neck, proclaiming them to be somehow associated with this despicable farce of a convention. They strolled about without a care in the world — the city belong to them as far as they were concerned. Screw the fact that by the end of this exercise in insanity the city is going to wind up spending more than it’ll make. First a national deficit inflation, now the republicans are driving up the city’s own beleaguered budget woes. Thanks a lot.

At the Avenue of the Americas was the biggest sign of the reality gap. Traffic had been closed down to about one lane and the sides of the streets were lined with a mix of people both with and against the convention. From my view, it looked like the anti’s outnumbered the pros by about 2 to 1. Of course, the scene was quite calm but the underlying tension was there. All that would be needed was a simple catalyst to come driving by in a motorcade to set the protesters ablaze with rage and venom.

I was ready to wretch just from the stifling amount of oversized limos I saw — at least one for every cab that passed by and three for every bus I saw. Like some perverted premiere gala, filled with those too important to deal with the little folk. Hell, could they even tell there were people outside through those windows tinted blacker than death itself? Does that fact that 1,700 people (and counting) have been arrested and thrown into unsanitary holding cells even register with them inside those plush and gaudy Hummer limos? Can’t they see the way the populous abhors their presence? Maybe they’re blinded by the fantasy scene they’ve woven for themselves inside Madison Square Garden.

And what did I do when I got home, after willingly subjecting myself to those who’s ideology turns my stomach and blisters my soul? I turned on the convention to listen to the speeches and yell at my television in disgust. I must be a masochist. Either that, or it’s the events of the world that are making me that way.

The fear. The loathing. The dread. Call it what you will but I think I’ve caught it.